My Comfort Food Habit & How I Knew It Was Becoming a Problem
Coffee and croissants have gotten me through many a long day.
When I was working in New York City years ago (back before I was a Health Coach), there were many days where I was simultaneously stressed and bored — stressed over my long list of to-do’s and the typical office politics, yet bored with the actual work.
I put a bandage over my stress and boredom by distracting myself with afternoon coffee shop runs (typically Oren’s or the Joe Coffee kiosk in Bryant Park if I had a little extra time). The days where I needed a double dose of cheer I got a pastry to go with my almond milk latte.
My new routine got me out of the office and into that “fresh” Times Square air so I could find that little bit of comfort to get me through the rest of the day.
Now here’s the thing, and this is important:
There’s absolutely nothing wrong with enjoying food and treating yourself! Enjoy your food with pleasure and without guilt. Have a treat and truly ENJOY it.
I still love an afternoon (decaf) latte and the occasional croissant, but the awareness and intention around it is different now.
When it starts to get out of hand, that’s when it becomes a problem.
Repeatedly turning to food for comfort when you’re feeling stressed, sad, bored, [insert whatever emotion] starts to become an issue when it:
1) Leads to other problems, such as your health, relationships, or finances.
2) Keeps you hiding from the real reasons behind needing that comfort.
3) Makes you feel out of control.
It could be one, two, or a combo of all three. Let’s break each of these down a bit more…
Repeatedly turning to food for comfort can become a problem if it:
1) Leads to other problems, such as your health, relationships, or finances.
Treating yourself isn’t necessarily a problem unless it gets out of control and leads to health problems — anything from low energy and unwanted weight gain to prediabetes and autoimmune flare ups.
Even think of your finances — if you’re drinking a couple glasses of wine every night as the only way to relax, that can add up to a hefty part of your budget by the end of the month.
2) Keeps you hiding from the real reasons behind needing that comfort.
A lot of us turn to food when we need comfort because we’ve trained our brains to expect that dopamine hit once we indulge in chocolate/potato chips/ice cream/etc. It’s worked over and over to make you happy in the moment, until you realize that the negatives are starting to outweigh the positives.
This is why I coach my clients through all aspects of their life and uncover the sources of their stress to get to the root cause that’s leading them to the food.
3) Makes you feel completely out of control.
There’s so much we have zero control over in life. Even with our bodies, we have to let go of some control and accept the fact that we can’t control every outcome.
You DO however have agency over the thoughts and choices you make for yourself, even though it may not seem like it right now if you’re feeling consumed by thoughts of food all the time. You can definitely get to a place where you’re not dominated by thoughts of food anymore.
If you reflect on your own relationship with food for a minute, do any of these three things resonate with you? It can be just one, two, or even all three.
For me, consistent climbing workouts and otherwise healthy eating habits kept the croissants off my waistline for the most part back then.
I knew my comfort eating was a problem though when I realized it was keeping me from confronting the underlying truth: that I was unfulfilled by my work and needed to make a change, but I felt stuck.
My afternoon pick-me-up made me feel better in the moment, but it wasn’t actually fixing anything. It just put a bandaid on the real problem.
Have you ever had a similar experience turning to food when stressed, bored, anxious, sad, etc. where it made you feel good in the moment but not so great later on? If so, just know that there’s nothing wrong with you and you’re not alone. I hear about this so often and help my clients through it as well, and it’s 100% possible to turn it around.
I see other health coaches and the health & wellness industry as a whole focus so much on WHAT you should or should not eat in order to “be healthy”.
While paying attention to what you eat is indeed important, it’s only part of the picture. At the end of the day, it’s not just about WHAT you’re eating but also HOW and who you’re being when you eat.
Clients have shared with me that they know all the foods they’re “supposed” to be eating, yet they can’t stop the habit of beelining for the kitchen when they get a few minutes to take a break and mindlessly eat a snack that they don’t even want.
Or knowing all the right foods that a skilled nutritionist laid out for them, but that doesn’t help in the moments where they’re feeling down and need their go-to comfort food fix.
Knowing WHAT to reach for is indeed important, but it’s highly personalized — what works for one person might not work for you.
We explore this deeper in my 1:1 Program by gathering more personalized information from my Client, like their:
Lifestyle
Stress level
What their schedule looks like
What they’re WILLING to try (that’s a big one)
Which foods leave them feeling energized and satisfied the best (hint: there are common threads, but it’s not the same for everyone)
My favorite part of the process is what comes after — helping them uncover what’s behind the comfort eating, “upgrading” their self care and eating habits, and successfully implementing those habits into their life.
The goal is to learn intuitive eating so you know what works for YOUR body, rather than following someone else’s strict diet that may or may not work for you.
If you want more personalized support to help you change your comfort eating habit for good so you can feel better about your choices with food without feeling deprived, then hop on a free call with me.
We’ll talk about where you are now, where you want to be, and what’s been getting in the way. I’ll share how I can help, and if it feels right for you, we can chat about next steps. If not, no worries — you’ll still walk away with clarity on what to focus on next.